i wish i could punch strippers in the face.
or at least the ASSHOLE that drags people to the strip club and all but places one of those disease infested crotch-jockeys on the lap of the one that you love.
sure. i bet i'm offending someone out there in the web-iverse but i couldn't give a shit if you paid me to.
i HATE the stripping "profession".
i try so fucking hard every day to look like the Megan Foxes and the Giselles of the world. i work out, i watch what i eat, i take pills on occasion, i stuff my fingers down my throat....
and still, i have to fight through the constant barage of strippers and cinematic "artful nudity" and the MILLIONS of porn videos/pictures out there.
it's an uphill battle that i don't think i'll ever win. i mean, let's just be honest here. i've had a kid. and the way i ballooned out while i was incubating him has all but secured Stretch Marks as my most noticable physical trait for the rest of my life. my boobs look like two overly depressing suicide notes stuffed into a bra that's breaking a sweat and going into muscle failure just trying to hoist them up to where they should be.
how can i compete?
now i know what y'all are prolly thinking;
Krista, you're married. He loves you. You love him. Nothing else matters! You don't have to compete with anyone!
to this I say:
BullFuckingShit.
of course i do.
when i'm not around, guess who is? Molly Muffbucket and Sally Sluttypants on the interwebs just waiting.
when i'm not "in the mood" guess who is? Candy Cummings at the strip club, scantily clad and disturbingly perky.
the fuck do i have to do.
i don't think there's anything i can do.
except maybe slap every stripper/pornstar that i see and tell them to stop making life so hard for men everywhere and the ladies (or fellas) that love them.
i'd NEVER do that to another woman's man.
what a sick world i live in.
I totally agree with you but from Mommy's everywhere I and seeing some of the mommy's you are by far on the better side than most! You are looking gorgeous! and any guy would love to "have fun with you" on the interweb! :) or at least thats what i tell myself when i feel the same way!... on a side note... when my Mike was deployed a few ladies I work with encouraged me to get sexy pictures taken (they have photographers that do it tastefully but still sexy) for him to "keep"... i didn't do it but i thought about it!! I still want to eventually.. anyways off topic... Good blog as always
ReplyDeleteFEEL THE SAME WAY!!!!!
ReplyDeleteMolly Muffbucket?! I'm sorry but thats freakin' hilarious. (The name i mean)...I'm sorry you're having a rough time sis. Move to canada. Its better up there. Anyways, my room smells like spagetti and just remember that you're beautiful & awesome to me K. Probably to mike too. And the 20 followers you have. *jealous*
ReplyDeletekeep your chin up kid. remember stretch marks are like battle scars. people love battle scars.
You disappeared off my facebook :( lol....Molly Muffbucket reminds me of the Orbitz commercials :-p...I can honestly say i have never been to a club/strip club or anything of the sort....never had the urge to honestly. I dont know what your going through but i hope it gets better. Your blog keeps me laughing at times and sometimes its the little things in life that makes the big things seem less big...like one of your other posts said :-p. Keep your chin up and remember tommorow is a new day.
ReplyDelete